take my hand
    i'm a stranger in paradise
   All lost in a wonderland
   A stranger in paradise


If I stand starry-eyed
That's a danger in paradise
For mortals who stand beside an angel like you

i havent been blogging cos my iphone wire isnt working and can't be detected on my com, which means i can't upload photos ): can only email one by one which is really mafan. ): so here is one picture of eldon being girly (:

i think he makes quite a good girl, don't u think? his hips are more flexible than mine in any case (: and my papers have been okayyyyy so far... haha i hope to get enough to scrape through moe's requirements to keep me safe for another semester!!! am excited for NZ, but not for thailand. ): i needa take 3 jabs for thailand somemore ): after my second last paper yest, went dancing at SP! :D samba is really funnnn :D this is my interest in dance cycle diagram:

delicate beauty

well, i can't sleep, and i dont feel like sleeping yet. so i do what i do best. stalking pretty girls. haha, but i think she is the most beautiful girl in the world. olivia hussey (: i can stare at her for hours. but that sounds a bit weird. (: she's perfectttt <3

oh gosh. one paper tired me out this much. i can't bring myself to start studying for the next one tmr ): i was real stressed for today's paper for some reason. i woke up so many times last night,kept dreaming of mcdowell (who is one of the authors of some of the readings for my module) the paper itself was alright though, but not fantastic, i think i didnt do such a great job with the second question ): not so worried for tomorrow's paper cos it's MCQ, plus its a science gem, which means i can S/U it if i do badly. haha. i shall show u cute pictures taken by Jason Lee! it cheered me up so much :D they are sooooo cute!!!!!

Full article here: http://www.mymodernmet.com/profiles/blogs/a-father-who-creatively

when you're dreaming with a broken heart

When you try your best, but you don't succeed When you get what you want, but not what you need When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep Stuck in reverse

I read a really interesting article recently on stomp: Rich grad meets hawker: More S'porean girls OK with 'marrying down'

http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/stomp/sgseen/this_urban_jungle/1060856/fresh_grad_marries_hawker.html#commentSection



but the amount of Singaporean female bashing is quite amazing. so many ppl are just going on and on about how shallow and materialistic sg girls are compared to her, and how girls should wake up and learn from her etc.


i do agree that it's a lovely relationship they have, but seriously. how does it link to then slamming all other girls for their choices?


so what if some ladies don't want to date blue collared workers?


maybe I can ask a few more questions to make it clearer:

so what if some guys/girls don't want to date tall/short people?
so what if some guys/girls don't want to date fat/thin people?
so what if some guys/girls don't want to date dancers/doctors/cleaners/whateverprofession?



a life partner is such a personal choice.


so how is it fair that they are just picking on one attribute?


some people even say that these girls are so materialistic that even a white collared worker wouldnt want to date them.

so... if a guy likes dating tall girls, and won't give shorty girls a glance, then the tall girls should be offended by his shallow character and not want to date him?


NO RIGHT?


maybe the guy likes his girl to be able to touch the rim of the basketball hoop, maybe the girl likes her guy to be able to be able to pamper her.

i think it's acceptable that everyone has their own tastes, especially in such a personal matter




all in all, it was a really sweet love story, but its been turned into ammunition to shoot other people. which is not very nice.



gosh. just live and let live.


and i wasted so much time on this ):

yest spent 1 hr catching beetle, today wasting time blogging )):


oh mannnnnn.


i need to study!!!

studying is the perfect opportunity for day dreaming, thinking random things, and reading yahoo news and xiaxue's blog.


sigh.

i put my banana in the fridge, so when i took it out it was nice and cold. i wonder why restaurants dont do this when they make banana splits?





i wonder if hiring a personal trainer or getting a personal exercise plan will encourage me to move my butt and exercise. hmm... it's so expensive though ): but it would be so nice to come home from exchange, not with the extra 5kg that ppl usually accumulate from sep but with muscles!!!!!




yest eldon and i tried the new store near my hostel. its so nice!! we had stingray and mee soto :D yumm. im hungry thinking about it.

anyway, eldon eats very fast. i gotta catch up with him.

but i ate more than him!!! :D



and i caught a beetle yest.


it flew into my room with a horrible buzzing, and landed on my phone. means i cant call for help. and my neighbours were out, and eldon just left. so poor defenseless me was all alone.

i shrieked and jumped out of my chair onto the bed.

and we stared at each other for abt 15 mins. i poked my phone with a chopstick but it didnt move.



it started WASHING its feelers in front of me, and sunbathing under my lamp.

oh gosh. horror of horrors.



i wanted to catch it with half a kinder egg cover, but i thought it might fly away.


so i sacrificed my hair essence jar, and trapped it in one swoop!!!


i then took a picture of my captive and then threw him away.


i did feel sorry after that since he was just holidaying in the sun.


but too bad he looks like a cockroach.

):

Aspirin mask

im so sick of studying. worms are gonna crawl out of my eyes soon.


):


Anyway, its day 4-6 of my aspirin mask experiment.


Please note it is NOT panadol, NOT paracetamol or any other fever reducing medicine. it must be ASPIRIN. which can be bought from watsons.



it supposedly produces quite magical results, and even ppl like michelle phan

http://www.soompi.com/forums/topic/128546-aspirin-mask-clear-face-33333/

her tutorial is somewhere on this thread.


and so many ppl are raving about it.


so i decided to give it a try.

i've been breaking out quite frequently, and its not simple whiteheads or blackheads that i can easily self-extract. its deep lodged cystic kind, and super painful.


and i've been relying heavily on medicine to suppress inflammation for about... maybe 1 year plus on and off. and i'm sick of eating medicine for skin.


i think i prob tried everything under the sun. i had seasons when my skin was really clear and nice, and seasons where its just atrocious. but the good seasons dont last long, sadly. ):



so anyway, i've been using aspirin PLUS i stopped eating medicine.


ok, i think aspiring works well as spot treatment. i.e directly put aspirin on the acne and it subsides overnight. not fully gone, but it at least shrinks significantly.


i dunno whether its the effect of aspiring purging my skin and bringing a lot of impurities to the skin surface, or the result of not eating medicine, but the next day i got a breakout near my jawline, a mixture of painful bumps and whiteheads.

my facialist was quite shocked, but anyway, all the whiteheads and stuff are extracted, but she explained too that its good to let the bad stuff come out so that it wont be trapped underneath. cos i previously have been eating doxycycline which suppresses the toxin, but she always warned me that once i stop it will be worse.



anyway, the other bumps have been subsiding after a couple more days of aspirin.


the worst effect is that my skin is quite dry now from all that salicylic acid (which is what aspirin is made of), and a little rough from the constant exfoliation (cos the aspirin grains are quite rough)



but while my face is nowhere near completely smooth so far, i think its still quite effective in reducing acne and redness. and mainly i just have to wait for scars to fade and cell renewal etc.


plus, its not getting any worse since after the first day, which in itself is a plus, because i removed myself from the crutch of medicine. and all the bumps from the first breakout are all healing nicely/totally gone


tho it makes me sneezy when the grains get in my nose.


but its still earlyyy, abt 4-6 days only.


i will update about it!!


time for a round of aspirin mask before i sleep.

(:

Et s'il ne nous restait plus qu'une semaine à vivre
Serais-tu prêt à me suivre
Pour s'endormir ensemble à New York
Et s'il ne nous restait plus qu'une semaine à vivre
Serais-tu prêt à me suivre
La bas, le long des docks

There was a girl called Conchita

There was a girl called Conchita
She was a hot bonita
All the boys wanted to meet her
And that is how the story goes


Oh, no, no, no, Conchita!
Why you're running for your life?
You can stop it, would I kill you?
But you're running to survive



There was a girl called Conchita
She had a hot colita
Now she's old, nobody greets her
And that is how the story goes

That being said, i suddenly miss eldon n his cuddles.



Ok, i said it. Im gonna cough out a hairball now.W

Jialat. this list of 45 things that girls want is going around facebook. and its making me rather worried. cos i don't seem to be very normal :0






10. Hangout with her and your friends together: sounds real bad, but no thanks. im happy to keep groups of friends separate. unless they're already mutual friends, im happy if u go hang with ur buddies, i'll hang with mine. i dont want to meet urs, and i don't want u to meet mine. same kinda goes for families actually. hahah, though that might not work in the long run.





14. When she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back.

15. When her friends say “I love her more than you”, deny it.

Fight back and hug her tight so she can’t get to her friends. It makes her feel loved.

omg. so mushy i can't stand it!!! and i wouldn't be touched at all, i'd be completely embarrassed


16. Always hug her and say I love you whenever you see her.: overkill.








21. Open doors for her, walk her to her car - it makes her feel protected, plus it never hurts to act like a gentleman.: okay i do like this one.


22. Tell her she’s your everything - only if you mean it.: noooo, claustrophobia would seep in. i don't believe in anyone being anyone's everything. that's plain obsessive.



25. Kiss her in front of OTHER girls you know!: this falls under PDA. No.




45. Sit on top of her and tell her how much you love her and then bend down to her face and kiss her while you’re sitting on her.: eh? won't i be crushed?







it's prob both easy and not easy to be my bf at the same time.


i think dating me is like dating a cactus

i don't need too much attention, i'm ok left alone for long periods of time. i wouldnt cry or anything if i felt neglected

in fact if u disturb me too much, i'll poke u.

but i'm often prickly, quite unromantic, not very sweet, quite sarcastic, proud.

:/




ah.. she was such a proud flower..




haha i really often do think that affection should be reserved for the private sphere. whats wrong with behaving normally in public? isnt love just friendship set on fire?


anyway. relationships are built on friendship, not on fluff like romance, though its fine to have it i guess. in appropriate amounts. too much, and u'll choke n die.




and people often forget that having someone as ur bf/gf does not in anyway reduce the autonomy of the person or make them yours.

it really just means that u have a mutual emotional understanding. that's all.


they don't belong to you. nope. not even one hair.

they're God's people, not yours.

migration and gender activism

had a long day studying!!!

my head's full of gender activism stuff and migration and all the other geog-y things. thank goodness i actually like the stuff so it makes it a bit easier to be interested in studying it.

anyway, so talking about migration. do u know there are 97 million migrants around the world, half of which are women. and women are increasingly moving as independent migrants. i.e. not part of a family or as a trailing spouse.


AND im about the join the ranks :D moving to nz for 6 months is a temporary migration too (:


of course it puts strains on relationships and stuff, and someone suggested that if one person wants to move, someone has to sacrifice. hmm. i wonder how it will work out. most migrant women said that they trust that they will keep their virtue intact, but could not say the same for their husbands. hahaha. i thought that was rather interesting. i wonder if the trend has changed with younger couples :D


and one of the biggest concerns my friends and family have is about violence against women overseas. he keeps warning me to be careful etc etc. which is really interesting, because it ties in with my geography discourses, and raises a few questions.

but i dont think anyone is that keen to hear about my geography syllabus ):


so i shall post a really interesting argument that was going around facebook






but anyway, violence against women has been shown to have little connection with clothes. its often nothing much to do with desire either. its about power, because an attack against a woman is not just an attack on her person, but symbolically on her nation, as a trespassing of a man's property etc etc. which is all quite sexist, but the view is still dominant.




isn't geography interesting???



and hall gave us a welfare pack full of snacks :D yummm!!! im gonna do some light reading, deserve it for my hardwork today :D

it's nice to not really have school anymore (: although it's study break so im technically still not free to do what i want


anyway, i'm a lucky girl when i think about it. i have wonderful parents, a super sis, a loving bf and the greatest friends.


and even though school is stressful and all sometimes, i guess i'm lucky i have an education. even more so that it's sponsored. sometimes i get jealous of dancers who don't have to study and get to dance full time. but im lucky that im sponsored for studies, so i still have money to spend on dancing, which is really super expensive and can be tough on the pocket sometimes.


OH and my parents gave me costume money for my birthday!!!!!!! YAYYYYY!!!! :D i can make a new costume when im back from nz :D


and i'm also lucky i got a really good partner, and both my partnerships have been pretty stable. lots of my friends keep changing partners every few months and end up wasting a lot of money and time. :/ lots of my friends too can't even find a partner that matches their level.
both guys and girls actually. ppl often think guys can find partners no prob. thats only true to a certain extent. i guess it depends if they're willing to dance with someone who's less good.

oh yes, im a lucky girl. or rather, blessed (:


ooh plus i have a yummy lunch :D

i got smoked salmon on cream cheese biscuits and minestrone soup (: yummmm




this brand of instant soup is really super. it's as good as the real thing. seriously!!!!

stars of tomorrow competition today (:

i was really pleasedddd with the results :D


though it was mad tiring!!! we danced 8 rounds, a total of 18 dances!


1st for Nov rising A n B
1st for Nov A
3rd for Nov B

but i'm actually MOST PLEASED that we got recalled for pre-am to semis. though eldon has prob been in pre-am finals so many times, being in semis only is kinda nothing. but i've never been recalled for pre-am in my life! so it was a thrill to me. i should have stolen the sheet of paper recalling pre-am competitors and taken it home.


of course there were the usual comments about eldon being really outstanding today. (: proud of him , he's so cute. he danced so hard that his pants split.


:D


and today is my first anniversary competing (:

if u don't count paso at TDA la

This made me feel.....I don't know what it made me feel. It just made me feel.

Happy 21st to me :D

dinner with family the day before (: this is actually the second dinner already, cos my family celebrated at swensons last week too. hahah







on top of the many gifts, family made me this super cool board game card!!!! so sweeett!!!!! esp when my dad played a big role in making it! hahaha <3









eldon's lovely gifts to me <3 super a lot of effort and planning! poor boy! <3









our adventures to pulau ubin!



place made pretty cos of instagram. lol





we went kayaking! actually supposed to wear life jacket, but cos eldon is a lifeguard we didnt have to!!!! yayyy benefits of a macho bf. :D and there were lots of fishies that we fed with the fish feed there. super exciting, but i was quite scared. and eldon only liked to feed the dumb looking fishes. WE SAW A SHARK!!!!!!!!! real long, and scary looking, but its not a human eater. and there're big stingrays tooo!!!


and actually i only pretended to kayak, just like i pretended to cycle. cos we took both bike and kayak for two. hahahaha, so i just happily feed fishes when kayaking and enjoy the wind when cycling. haha



kampung girl




the lunch buddies!


me


my boy




our little friend
she's heavily pregnant and such a good dog. she just sits there and don't disturb, never even make one sound. so we kept feeding her throughout lunch.



and us with food



lunch :D



doggie eating up the last bit of egg! eldon kept saying she's gonna die cos no food and she's so skinny, so poor thing cos she's pregnant. and i felt so sad, i gave her my last tofu, a lot of my egg, and all the chicken. and she's super cute



another pic of the place (:



my boy signs off with a wink!!! :p




thank you everyone for the wishes, presents and cards. appreciate it lots! (: lovelove

i have been terribly uninspired by my wardrobe recently, and getting very lazy. everytime i look at it, i take out a few pieces of sweet dresses, and i feel so gross and i put them all back and wear shorts.

it has been worrying me, and summer suggested that maybe it's because i'm attached that i don't bother as much. maybe to a certain extent it's true, but i think it's cos i've been growing out of my old style and haven't found a new one. don't judge if i sound obsessive! :p clothes are like identity okay.


anyway, i was browsing through lookbook, which is a wonderful online platform for ppl to display their styles. and i realised that all the pictures of dresses with lace and sweet pastels or ribbons seriously turned me off. and it came to me. omgosh, i don't like sweet baby doll girly things anymore. :o not that i don't like pink anymore, or any other colour. im just talking about a general style.


no wonder i have nothing left to wear.

so i compiled a selection of styles that i thought was nice. maybe it will help me find out what i like


I LOVE HER TIGHTS!!!!! and the colours

such a bad girl look! sexy max

I love her pants!

oh yes! maxis made hot :D

no more 100% sweetie kinda looks. lace and rock chic are a yummy mix

she's no fragile barbie doll, this is one power woman in hot pink!

this is actually kinda sweet, but glam too (:

absolutely adore this, and the hair

this looks like something i think summer would be smoking hot in

so pretty, all of these clothes, and of course the models as well

no one wins when everyone loses

studying evolution has put my head in a mess the last couple of weeks. making me rethink God, and faith and everything, as i was sharing with Joanna.


and anyway, eldon n i have had a couple of major fights, and kinda exciting drama, if ur the onlooker that is. :/

but anyway, as i was telling carin, i was realllllllly frustrated. and i prayed, and i read a bit of my 'growing deep in faith' book, and i really dunno how else to describe it, but i think God helped to 'clear my head'

i really do think its God, cos for the past few weeks, we've just been mad at each other on and off. and its not getting resolved.


but yea... finally we're at peace again.

sounds funny, but yea. i do think God works.